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Mi-am legat mintea in mii de colturi ascunse.
Am fost acuzata (pe buna dreptate) ca nu ma pot deprinde de lumea materiala si-am auzit cutiul rascucindu-se-n inima-mi prea putin deschisa fata de tot ceea ce conteaza si prea mult deschisa in fata vremelniciei. Am inghitit in sec -nu mi-am inghitit si mandria,desi as fi vrut era mult prea mare- am zambit, mi-am dat parul pe spate si-am plecat -la asta ma pricep uimitor de bine-. Ca orice las, sunt urmarita de remuscari si vocile rasar din tenebrele trecutului, mi-am intors privirea pentru o clipa -vroiam am sa vad daca are vreun sens sa privesc in urma- as fi vrut sa abandonez totul si sa recunosc cine sunt - suflet pierdut in cautare disperata de ajutor- dar lumea in ziua de azi nu are timp de pierdut, dispartatii nu mai sunt la moda iar de ajutor nu se mai da decat la crucea rosie (asta in cazul in care sunt dezinformata iar Crucea rosie s-a desfiintat)

Ma simt ca un titrez invartindu-se in voia sortii fara a stii cand se va oprii, unde si de ce ...intinzand mainile goale si cerand ajutor intr-o lume mult prea flamada de nepasare.

Imi vine sa tip 'nu ma lasa aici, ia-ma cu tine , du-ma in lumea ta plina de mistere elucidate inainte de cina, ganduri citite la cafeaua de dimineata, destine aflate in pauza de pranz! '

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Here we are again! I hoped you got lost in the nothingness of all the days that have passed since we last stood face to face, separated by darkness only. I can feel your breath on my neck and in my mind I am begging you again to let me go.

I feel your shadow surrounding me, your musty scent poisons the air around me.  Like a bad sin, you never stay away for too long. You call it 'love', I call it 'curse'. You think that all this is a game and I enjoy your company. Maybe you're just as confused as I am and mistake my tears for rain and my scream for help with a lullaby.   A deep breath before I turn to face you, your poisons scent inundates every cell in my lungs . I curse the moment I was born and wish I could run to the end of the world and hide in a cage for the rest of my miserable life.

I can see your sharp teeth shining in the candle light while you laugh in my face. Your unkind touch  makes me tremble beyond control. I am stretching my arm in the dark in a clu…


The space between the worlds where I can find myself without looking in the water reflection and getting a glimpse of what I once was and what I long to be.

There are no thoughts just the silence of my own soul.My armour is abandoned at the door I am free of darkness. I shred layer after layer until I walk naked and the ground shivers beneath my feet, the sun kisses all my imperfections and the wind calls my name. I will no longer hide behind the vail of lies. I raise my arms to the sky and I know I am where I belong. If this place would actually exist and have a name I could probably call it 'home'

Here, I allow myself to be. I can be simple, can be nobody and nobody's. I am nobody's child, nobody's lover, nobody's mother.

No longer the exhausted body that strives to look beautiful and thin to please those who can only see.
No longer the smile that shows up every time insecurities surface to impress those who judge.
No longer the laughter that hides a cry to …